1. Oh, my god! My husband will be home any second! 2.

Oh, my god! My kids will be home any second! 3.

Oh, my god! My husband and our kids will be home any second! 4. Wait...

you did say you also had herpies, right? 5. I bet you would never guess that I was once a man. 6. Where is my pocket rocket? Someone needs to finish the job.. 7. Okay, now it's my turn! Now where is my strap-on?! 8. Thanks a lot, quickdraw... 9. I'm not actually over 18... AND NUMBER 10.. YOU F**K LIKE A VIRGIN! Most of these will result in the guy scrambling out the bedroom window half dressed. If you think this is funny you should read my profile.