A man stops in at a bar during a long layover, and as hes sitting down on a barstool he notices a large mayonnaise jar sitting on the bars back shelf, and its stuffed with money. The barkeep walks over to take the mans order, and the man asks about the jar. Oh, says the barkeep, thats the prize. Prize for what? asks the man. Well, its twenty dollars to get in, then you gotta do three things. First, you gotta punch out the bouncer, and the man looks over his shoulder at the bouncer, and the bouncer is probably 65 and built like a Marine. Then, I gotta pit-bull in the back room, and hes gotta bad tooth.

You gotta pull the tooth. And then? asks the man. Then we gotta fat lady upstairs, 800 pounds if she weighs an ounce, and she hasnt been f**ked since the Nixon administration. You gotta satisfy her. Do all that, and the moneys yours.

The man continues to sit at the bar, and continues to look at the jar. If he won that prize it would clear all of his debts and hed have a good deal left over. He orders another drink, and another, and another, and then suddenly stands up, slaps a twenty dollar bill down on the bartop, walks over to the bouncer and WHAM!! In one blow the man knocks the bouncer out cold. Okay, he says, wheres the dog? The barkeep opens the door to the back room and immediately there is a loud, viscous barking, and the man chickens out. He sits back down on his stool and has another drink, and another, and another, and stands up again. Okay, he drawls, Lemme at the dog, The man goes into the room with the dog, and for a few minutes the sounds of shouting and barking fill the bar, until all that can be heard is the whimpering of the dog.

Shortly after this, the man comes out his suit is in shreds, blood is oozing from four places, and he drawls Okay, wheres the fat lady with the bad tooth.